Friday, September 04, 2009

Some People Just Don't Get It (Or, Poe Bill Donohue)

Catholic League blowhard Bill Donohue has a new book out with the awful title Secular Sabotage: How Liberals Are Destroying Religion and Culture in America. The title says it all, actually: secular means liberal (and vice versa), and the bad secularists/liberals are ruining (his) America.

Sorry, Bill, but there are many religions in America, and they are doing a fine job of ruining themselves. For the Catholic Church, I would think the whole kiddie-fucking and covering-up things would be contributing factors in their demise.

Oh, and spare us the jeremiads about modern culture going down the tubes. Seriously, is this theme - "In my day..."; "Things ain't what they used to be..."; "Today, anything goes..." - ever not played out in a society? Yeah, yeah. The American culture that spawned you was so wonderful and pure and christian. You didn't have any atheists or black people and everyone wept to baby jebus for their sins and absolutely everyone in the nation was humble and selfless and gawd-fearin'.

But Donohue's press release for the book is gold. In the release he gives the blurbs meant to praise the book. You know, these are quotes from notable people letting potential readers know that the book is important, timely, or saying what needs to be said. The blurbs are supposed to stir up positive interest toward book sales.

The only problem with Donohue's release is that one blurb shows Donohue's ridiculousnees. This blurb comes from Stephen Colbert, host of Comedy Central's fake news-analysis program, the Colbert Report.

Here's the full release from the Catholic League website:
Catholic League president Bill Donohue’s new book, Secular Sabotage: How Liberals Are Destroying Religion and Culture in America, is now in bookstores. Additionally, it can be ordered online at several book outlets. For $20, including shipping and handling, it can be ordered from the Catholic League: go to for information.

Here is what some are saying about the book:
  • “In these dispatches from the culture war, the indefatigable president of the Catholic League fires on all cylinders. With passionate prose he re-creates many of his hard-won religious battles and offers an urgent warning about what lies ahead.” – Raymond Arroyo, bestselling author of Mother Angelica, host of EWTN’s “The World Over Live”
  • “In this bracing, brutal exposé of the anti-God movement, Donohue delivers a common sense smackdown that is both informative and entertaining.” – Laura Ingraham, nationally syndicated radio talk show host and bestselling author
  • “Like the man himself, the book is feisty, controversial, impassioned, and important.” – Michael Medved, nationally syndicated talk show host
  • “Bill Donohue is right on target. Every Christian needs to read his book.” – Donald E. Wildmon, founder and chairman, American Family Association
  • “SECULAR SABOTAGE is an absolute must-read for anyone who believes the Judeo-Christian ethos is the very heart and soul of civilized society.” – L. Brent Bozell III, president, Media Research Center
  • “Wake up, America! The secular minority has cut the brake cables on America’s In-God-We-Trust-Mobile™! Not even all 43 of our Christian presidents can save us now.” – Stephen Colbert, host of “The Colbert Report”
Even a quick scan of the blurbs shows that Colbert's quote is different and probably parodic. The fact that it's the last blurb makes the contrast particularly sharp.

Colbert's quote is itself quite brilliant, from the dubious phrase "secular minority" to the trademark to the exclusion of president #44 to the prognostication of doom. It's dead-on parody. Donohue's been Poe-ed

I wonder when/if Donohue or his publisher will realize that the blurb actually pokes fun at the Catholic League's stance. But maybe Donohue already knows that the quote isn't genuine - perhaps he's poking fun at himself. Hmm. I tend not to think of Donohue as the self-deprecating type, if this video is any indication:

Maybe Bill thinks his readers won't catch the rhetoric of the Colbert quote or won't get that Colbert hosts a news show based in satire.

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