I Want Vistors and/or Comments

OK, here goes ...

I have heard it said in the blogosphere that Sarah Palin is a....

Aargh, I can't do it. I was going to drop a C-bomb, but it's just not right. I know very little about Sarah Palin and I'm probably voting republican anyway.

Sigh.

I'd still like some comments.

Maybe I need to find something interesting to say.

Why the Press Isn't Taken Seriously

This is an excellent assessment of the sort of media hypocrisy and shenanigans I've railed against for years.

Just Good Enough to Deconstruct

John McIntyre has one of my favorite blogs on writing. Today's post looks at public apathy toward quality - in consumer products and in writing. While I agree with most of his points, I want to take issue with what he does at the end, which is take a cheap shot at deconstruction. In my view he mis-characterizes deconstruction by making it a philosophy of meaninglessness. It's rather an unfortunate cheap shot that glosses over the real insights that a deconstructive approach can yield.

Let's go through the post in sequence. He begins:

Here’s a start for a profoundly depressing day.

The estimable David Sullivan, my colleague at The Philadelphia Inquirer, has a sobering post at That’s the Press, Baby on copy editing and quality. Reacting to a section of a long analysis of American newspapering by Vin Crosbie, he explores the idea that for most readers, good enough is the only standard that matters.

Much of the video quality on Youtube is poor, he points out, but it’s good enough to amuse people; cell phones are less reliable than land lines, but they are good enough to satisfy the customers; a great deal of the writing on the Internet is less than optimal, but it is good enough for all but the most demanding readers. And it’s all free. You could pay money for a newspaper that is better edited, but why would you, if you can get basically the same information, for free and good enough.

Then he says -

It’s not hard to see where this is going. Where this has already been going, as newspapers cut back on all that expensive and time-consuming editing and give the reader the “unmediated” work of reporters, God save the mark. For the past 28 years, I have closed the day in some confidence that the next morning’s paper was better in some respects for my having been on the desk. But the number of people willing to pay for a product with some assured level of quality* — and worse, the number of advertisers confident that such a quality product is the right vehicle for their sales pitches — dwindles.

He closes out with this -

Mr. Sullivan is probably right in speculating that the novelty will begin to fade from many of the currently popular Web sites. I suspect that the great and painful sorting-out under way among American newspapers will result in products — electronic certainly, and perhaps even in print — that have readers and the revenue to support the enterprise. And somewhere in these emerging enterprises there will be a desire for accuracy, precision and clarity. That will require editing. So maybe it’s not the best idea to cut loose all the copy editors just yet.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go into the office and put out a newspaper. If I do my job properly, it will be some better than good enough.

In an interesting move, he gives not one but two footnotes, and the real action of the post - for me, anyway - happens here. The first note undercuts possible objectors:

* Before you write about all the ignorant errors you have spotted in The Baltimore Sun and whom do I think I am fooling, let me save time by giving you the answers in advance: (1) You have not seen the ignorant errors that the copy desk caught, and (2) you have not taken into account the quality of most other American newspapers.

The second note, however, goes after deconstruction. McIntyre says:

** If I can digress — and who will stop me? — I suspect that the slow seepage of deconstructionist ideas from the academy into mainstream culture over the past 30 years has contributed to the difficulties in mainstream journalism. If it is the case that any text is merely a reflection of certain interests and power relationships, and if there is no external reality to which a text corresponds, then all of us will think what we prefer to think (or what those power relationships have programmed us to think), and the mainstream media’s preoccupation with fictitious concepts such as “objectivity” is merely another sham. That this is the case may be seen plainly in political journalism, in which people read and tenaciously hold on to assertions that are demonstrably false.

Is it the case "that any text is merely a reflection of certain interests and power relationships"? Well, yes, any text reflects interests and relationships, but a text has more to it than this - so it is NOT merely a reflection. A text actively constructs such relationships. It defines them and gives them a concrete grounding visible to all in and as writing. The reflection is not derivative and it is not identical; rather it is innovative and differential, and this is the whole problem of language. Language is not backwards referential but forwards.

But then I should come back a bit because there's a fundamental quality of text that I think needs to be recognized. Text is not a thing. Just like knowledge is information put to use, text is inscription/writing put to interpretation. In other words, text consists of both the thing being read and the process of reading together. The idea that text makes the scene of (social/political/personal) interests and relationships is not deconstructionist per se. But deconstruction's proponents suggest that these interests and relationships can be inferred and that they matter - at the point(s) of writing and reading.

Pointing the Way

A wonderful article by Roy Peter Clark that illustrates how to read with sensitivity and an eye towards rhetorical analysis.

And ... there's a great bit on the role of punctuation. Clark says -

When I took a close look at the punctuation, I marveled at its unobtrusive richness and variety. Without calling attention to itself, the punctuation helped organize and drive the meaning of the text. When you admire a cathedral, it's easy enough to see the rose windows, soaring steeples and flying buttresses. But it is often the little things -- a carving near a choir seat -- that reveal the true genius and attention to detail.

In my days as a literary scholar, I too marveled at the power of punctuation to influence the evolution of meaning in texts. Punctuation, done right, can have an awesome "ripple effect" in how meaning emerges.

Removing Any Doubts ...

... that the Boston Globe is part of the established order and no longer the people's check on it:

Taxachusetts no more

August 11, 2008

EFFORTS TO tamp down antitax sentiment in Massachusetts got an unexpected boost last week: the small-government advocates at the National Tax Foundation in Washington, D.C., issued a report showing that the state's tax burden has dropped a few notches this year. The epithet "Taxachusetts" has been difficult to shake, but the foundation report ranks the state 23d out of 50 for the bite state and local taxes take out of a resident's paycheck. That's just about the middle by anyone's calculation.

As incomes rise and taxes remain fairly stable, Massachusetts' standing improves. The report shows the tax burden here declining steadily since 2005, when Massachusetts ranked 18th among the states. Back in 1980, the year a property tax revolt fueled passage of Proposition 2 1/2, the state ranked second, just behind New York.

States with higher tax burdens include many considered competitors for jobs and skilled workers: California, North Carolina, and Virginia, for example. New Jersey has the highest tax burden of all.

To avoid statistical distortions, it is important to calculate taxes as a proportion of personal income, instead of just per person. States with lower incomes than Massachusetts may have somewhat lower tax rates, but the tax bill hurts more for poorer residents of Arkansas (which ranks 14th for tax burden) or Georgia (16th). It is somewhat akin to the wind-chill factor: the temperature (raw data) may say one thing, but what matters is how much the cold hurts.

In November, voters will be faced with a ballot question to eliminate the state income tax. The tax foundation's report shows Massachusetts moving in the right direction. It should help inform a debate based on facts, not slogans.

Of course, I fully support efforts to eliminate the state income tax. Clearly this piece wants me to reconsider, as if I should be wowed by our number 23 ranking. Or as if I should feel uneasy that "competitor" states such as California rank higher.

This is unabashed propaganda. Denounce it, all.

Outdated? Unreliable? I Don't See a Problem

My ghostwriting employer is angry with me. Beneath the surface, there's always been some tension. He believes, rightly, that at heart I am an agnostic and evolutionist. I am also a skeptic and iconoclast, so this project should work out.

My author friend wondered why I had not been using the quotes from his 1994 book (which uses material compiled in the late 1980s). So, I sent him a table listing all the quotes he wished to use. What the table showed was that all the quotes were either very old, unreliable, taken out of context or off-point. I figured he would see the table and say "You're right. If I use these quotes I may impress some people who don't have access to the Internet, but most people will either yawn from having seen these so often before or lambaste me for using stuff that is incorrect and/or deceptive." That's what I figured, anyway. Here is what I got (pretty much as it was written to me - I omitted the salutation at the very beginning):

this is absurd and shows a real divergence between us on this book.

in essence, you accept evolution. i question it. but it is my book.

you are overly deferential to science when you don't need to be. dawkins' weasel experiment? have you read any of dawkins many, many critics. why do you take what he says at face value?

as far as the quotes are concerned, what's wrong with the dates? darwin is from 1859. so should dawkins not quote him?

as far as adaptation being refuted, it was replaced by genetic mutation. you know that. so i don't understand your comment at all. it was neo-lamarckian.

as far as mutations being almost entirely lethal and harmful, read dawkins. he says the same thing.

if you don't want to use older quotes, and i see nothing wrong with it, then find newer ones on the same subject. but you have crossed a line and are now writing YOUR book instead of mine.

how can you say that mutation depends on environment? noone questions that 99% of mutations are harmful. you have become more a believer in it that dawkins or anyone else.

you are not doing the research we alwayd discussed. we talked about updating, not dissecting.

your comments here have really unnerved me. we need to meet asap. in the meantime, you must please follow the mandate of what we talked about.

wehther or not mayr knew of the most recent DNA data has nothing to do with how detrimental mutations are. i find your comments incredulous.

I will admit to being unpleasantly surprised at the passion of the response, but this guy is a real dick!

Let's respond to each point.

"this is absurd and shows a real divergence between us on this book." - We can't disagree on the fucking evidence we bring in to educate our readers? Puh-leeze. The abusurdity is the hissy-fit being thrown in my direction when what we should be having is a discussion between mature individuals.

"in essence, you accept evolution. i question it. but it is my book." - Yes, I accept evolution, but I also question it. That much should be very clear in Chapter 2. In my opinion, we make the best claim against evolution - that it's so full of itself and its message that it will not accept questioning from outside its fundamental assumptions. This is a powerful argument that essentially makes evolution one story among many, not a privileged path to truth.

"you are overly deferential to science when you don't need to be. dawkins' weasel experiment? have you read any of dawkins many, many critics. why do you take what he says at face value?" - We're not scientists! We have no knowledge or experience to use in refuting most any evidence/conclusion brought forth by the scientific community. I've certainly read the responses to Dawkins' weasel experiment. In my opinion, they are not compelling - they ascribe implications to the experiment that Dawkins never claims.

"as far as the quotes are concerned, what's wrong with the dates? darwin is from 1859. so should dawkins not quote him?" - Aargh. My point was that the science was outdated. Most quotes of Darwin are for explanation on historical grounds.

"as far as adaptation being refuted, it was replaced by genetic mutation. you know that. so i don't understand your comment at all. it was neo-lamarckian." - As I told him, so what? Darwin was shown to be wrong about something. That's science!

"as far as mutations being almost entirely lethal and harmful, read dawkins. he says the same thing." - Where, where, oh where does he say this? I've looked at the books!!

"if you don't want to use older quotes, and i see nothing wrong with it, then find newer ones on the same subject. but you have crossed a line and are now writing YOUR book instead of mine." - I've crossed a line? He should be thanking me for trying to watch his back. I was only trying to keep him from looking like an idiot.

"how can you say that mutation depends on environment? no one questions that 99% of mutations are harmful. you have become more a believer in it that dawkins or anyone else." - This is simply untrue and insulting. A beneficial mutation in one environment may not be so much in another. He says "no one questions" it, provides a phantom quote and some outdated ones and expects me to buy it. I'm a "believer," huh? Sorry but I read, I evaluated and I concluded. End of story. This was a real low-life comment.

"you are not doing the research we alwayd discussed. we talked about updating, not dissecting." - Sorry, I'll turn off my brain now. Yeees, masssterrrr!

"your comments here have really unnerved me. we need to meet asap. in the meantime, you must please follow the mandate of what we talked about." - You've debated Dawkins, Atkins and Hitchens. You've hung out with famous, successful people. I've unnerved you? Grow the fuck up, man! We're talking about making something with intellectual merit. Nothing personal.

"wehther or not mayr knew of the most recent DNA data has nothing to do with how detrimental mutations are. i find your comments incredulous." - It means Mayr did not have all the data at his disposal, that's all.

I sent a mea culpa. I want to go on with this. But I am losing love for this guy.

from Pharyngula - Hitchens to Luskin is as Lion to Mouse

Pharyngula: Hitchens : Luskin :: Lion : Mouse

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More Xian Love

I rarely post twice in a single day, but this web page was too good not to keep:

THE SCANDAL OF CHRISTIAN GHOSTWRITING

by Texe Marrs

“…Readers pay exorbitant prices for the books of Christian superstars, never knowing that the volumes are actually written by no-name "ghosts." Among the big names pulling this stunt: Hal Lindsey, Chuck Colson, Jim Bakker, Billy Graham, Oral Roberts, Benny Hinn, John Ankerberg, Hank Hanegraaff, David Jeremiah and Jerry Falwell.”

Are some of the most cherished books in your personal Christian library written by ghostwriters, some of whom may be homosexuals, atheists, and New Agers? Before you answer "no", please read this article very carefully. A tragic and disreputable hoax is being perpetrated on unsuspecting Christians. And you might be one of the chief victims. “Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth. that shall he also reap.” (Galatians 6:7)

The Reverend Mel White is a homosexual activist who lives with his male lover, Gary Nixon, in Dallas, Texas. "I am gay, I am proud, and God loves me without reservation," White recently told David Calker, a Los Angeles Times reporter. White, who "pastors" a militantly gay church, is also a writer of many Christian books. But though he's the author, his name doesn't appear on the front covers. Instead, a Christian celebrity's name appears on each of Mel White's books. White is what the book industry fondly calls a "ghostwriter."

Ghostwriting Rampant in "Christian" Publishing

The scandalous practice of an unnamed and concealed person ghostwriting a book for a celebrity is rampant in Christian publishing. Virtually all the larger book publishing firms do it. The question is, is this practice immoral, dishonest, and deceitful?

After all, the buyer of these books thinks he or she is getting inspired information direct from the hearts and pens of men like Billy Graham and Pat Robertson, each of whom has used ghostwriters. The reader pays good money for a beautifully packaged book with the hero celebrity's picture and name on the jacket. Never would the buyer suspect that the book is actually written by a homosexual, an atheist, or a New Ager. Thinking that he or she is taking in digestible spiritual food, the book buyer has no idea the ghostwritten
book may contain poisonous and insidious views hostile to Christianity imbedded in its text.

Big Name Personalities Use Ghostwriters

Homosexual activist Mel White has been an influential, behind-the-scenes ghostwriter for many big name personalities. He's written speeches for Lt. Col. Oliver North. White has also authored at least two of evangelist Jerry Falwell's books, including, unbelievable as it may seem, Falwell's autobiography, Strength for the Journey. Falwell could well afford White's fee to ghostwrite his books. The Moral Majority preacher was given a one million dollar advance by the publisher! The Reverend Mr. White has also been the secret force behind some of Billy Graham's best known books, including Graham's prophetic bestseller, The Approaching Hoofbeats. Indeed, White once even closeted himself in a luxurious condo for weeks with the famed evangelist down in Acapulco, Mexico, writing a book.

However, you'll search in vain to find author Mel White's name on either the cover or the title page of the books he wrote for Billy Graham. Nor is Mel White's name openly connected with Jerry Falwell's books. "It was important," White now reveals, "that Jerry Falwell not be scandalized because his biographer was a queer."

Ghostwriter White also wrote Pat Robertson's book, America's Dates With Destiny but the gay reverend is not the only "ghost" whom the veteran host of TV's The 700 Club has used for his chart topping books. Reportedly, Robertson's recent #l Christian bestseller, The New World Order, was also ghostwritten by a CBN staffer.

In The New World Order, "Pat Robertson" correctly warns readers that Freemasonry is an evil, Luciferian conspiracy. Yet, incredibly, Robertson's Christian Coalition subsequently held a "Road to Victory '93" conference in Washington, D.C., at which high-level Freemasons gave the keynote addresses! Pat Robertson's guest speakers at the conference included Senator Bob Dole, 33rd Scottish Rite Mason, and Senator Jesse Helms, yet another 33rd Mason.

Pat Robertson's book, The New World Order, also fingered the Council on Foreign Relations (CFR) as a Satan led, conspiratorial project. But at his "Road to Victory '93" gala, Robertson's keynote speaker was none other than Congressman Newt Gingrich. One worlder Gingrich just happens to be a loyal member of the same group which Pat's book exposes as a devilish front the CFR! The title of Gingrich's speech for the Christian Coalition conference was "Renewing American Civilization."

We are thus faced with these two alternatives: (l) either Pat Robertson did not even bother to read the best-selling book, The New World Order, that sports his celebrity name as author on its glossy cover; or (2) he allowed his name to be placed on a book, the contents of which he does not even believe in.

Can We Trust Christian Publishers?

My investigation of the Christian book world has uncovered the disgusting fact that the majority of books supposedly authored by famous Christian personalities are, in fact, the product of ghostwriters. Both novels and non-fiction books are involved. Sometimes, the real writer is recognized in the acknowledgments section or elsewhere in the book; but most often, he or she is not. Some celebrities, such as Chuck Colson, write their books "with" an unknown collaborator. In such cases, the ghostwriter's name is occasionally shown on the front cover in small, unassuming type. But shouldn't the cover jacket of these books have a warning label or notice revealing what percentage of the book is written by Colson and what percentage is the product of his lesser-known co-writer? Who really writes Colson's books - him or his collaborator? Whose ideas do his books reflect? The book buyer also deserves to be told some facts about the ghostwriter or co-writer, so that Mel White-type incidents are minimized. For example, a woman named Ellen Santilli Vaughn is listed as the co-writer of many of Chuck Colson's best-selling books, including his ecumenical-oriented book, The Body. But just who is "Ellen Santilli Vaughn?" What is her background? Is she a Christian...a Catholic...a Protestant...a New Ager? How much of the contents and philosophy of Chuck Colson's books is Ms. Vaughn responsible for?

Another prime example is prophecy teacher Hal Lindsey. Very few people know that Lindsey's mammoth bestseller, “The Late, Great Planet Earth,” was actually written by a woman, Carla Carlson. To his credit, Lindsey has publicly admitted this. The question remains, however: Who is Carla Carlson? Why was she involved in writing Lindsey's book? Why is her name not highlighted on the cover, in bold letters equally as large as those of Hal Lindsey? And finally: Are all of Hal Lindsey's books similarly written by unknown ghostwriters?

It is shameful that such vital and basic information is withheld from the book buyer. Shouldn't truth-in-packaging rules apply to publishing the way they do to other consumer product industries? Anything less would be a scam on my readers.

How to Make a Bundle from Ghostwritten Books

Now please understand: I do realize that in a few cases, it is perfectly acceptable for a talented professional writer to work with an expert or authority on a technical subject. An engineer, a medical doctor, a dietitian or a scientist researcher may find it expedient to work with a writer. But in such cases, it is the expert who has the original concept for the book. He dictates most of the text, and the book is based solely on his knowledge, ideas, work, and research.

This is rarely the case with celebrity Christian authors. Publishers are continually searching for "hot," new topics for books that can make them a lot of money. Usually, they, not the celebrity, choose a title for the book and only then contact and recruit the chosen celebrity. Publishers have been known to hire entire teams of writers and researchers to produce books.

Often, the greedy celebrity author merely gives the finished product a cursory look-over and adds his verbal blessing to the project. The celebrity is pleased because he knows he will make a bundle, with only minimal effort on his part. His name goes on the cover, and millions of Christian buyers are deceived into believing the celebrity, inspired by God, personally wrote every word in the book.

The Profit Motive is Paramount

It thus becomes crystal clear why publishers and celebrity authors conspire to produce ghostwritten books. The reason is simple: money, money, money! A best-selling, hardcover book with the glittery name of a Graham, Robertson, Colson, or Lindsey on the cover can bring in five to ten million dollars or more in income.

The celebrity "author" also profits - he can rake in as much as two million dollars per book. No wonder the rush is on by publishers to constantly create new, mostly fluff titles and to line up their ghostwriters with name celebrities known to be guaranteed money-makers in the Christian marketplace.

Truth Telling is in Order

So what's to be done about the lucrative, yet unethical and dishonest, practice of the ghostwriting of Christian books? I believe it is time for some truth telling. Thomas Nelson, Word, and all the other wealthy conglomerates who disguise themselves as "Christian" publishers should step up to the plate and give us a list of which books have been written by "ghosts" and which were really penned by the authors listed on their covers. That's the least they should do to come clean. Better yet, these greedy publishing houses and their celebrity stable mates should quit trying to fatten their coffers and make bucks off gullible Christian readers. They should cease their publishing of ghostwritten books entirely.

PZ's Great Desecration

One of the great discoveries I've been fortunate to make as a result of the science and religion project is the science blog Pharyngula by a biologist in Minnesota named PZ Myers. I find Myers to be bright, funny and exceedingly fair-minded.

Well, he got himself into a mess of trouble. It started with his reaction to what I thought was an amusing news story.

The outcry stemming from Myers's comments was amazing. The Catholic League - a very disagreeable sort - called for Myers to be fired. Others emailed/posted with everything from death threats to unsolicited prayer requests, and from whiny pleas in the "can't we all just get along?" vein to anti-Semitic name-calling.

After some buildup, Myers concluded the matter in a most appropriate way. The Catholic League could only muster a sad, little press release:

MYERS DESECRATES THE EUCHARIST

July 24, 2008

University of Minnesota professor Paul Z. Myers made good on his pledge to desecrate the Eucharist today. According to his statement on the subject, “I pierced it [the Host] with a rusty nail (I hope Jesus’s tetanus shots are up to date). And then I simply threw it in the trash.”

Saying he did not want to “single out just the cracker,” Myers also tore pages from the Koran along with a few pages from Richard Dawkins’ The God Delusion and nailed them to the Host. He then said, “They are just paper. Nothing must be held sacred. (His emphasis.) Question everything. God is not great, Jesus is not your lord, you are not disciples of any charismatic prophet.”

Catholic League president Bill Donohue responded as follows:

“A formal complaint against Myers has already been made. What he did—in both word and deed—constitutes a bias incident, as defined by the University of Minnesota. The policy says that ‘Expressions of disrespectful bias, hate, harassment or hostility against an individual, group or their property because of the individual or group’s actual or perceived race, color, creed, religion…can be forms of discrimination. Expressions vary, and can be in the form of language, words, signs, symbols, threats, or actions that could potentially cause alarm, anger, fear, or resentment in others…even when presented as a joke.’

“The University must now take action and apply the appropriate sanction. We are contacting the president, Board of Regents and the Equal Opportunity and Affirmative Action Office at the school, as well as Minnesota’s governor and both houses of the state legislature; the Catholic community in Minnesota is also being contacted. Moreover, we are also contacting Muslim groups nationwide.

“It is important for Catholics to know that the University of Minnesota will not tolerate the deliberate destruction of the Eucharist by one of its faculty. Just as African Americans would not tolerate the burning of a cross, and Jews would not tolerate the display of swastikas, Catholics will not tolerate the desecration of the Eucharist.”

Contact Myers at myersp@morris.umn.edu
Contact President Robert Bruininks at bruin001@umn.edu

I say, "Bravo, Myers."

It's All Supernatural

For the past several weeks, I have been working very hard at not only my primary job – which has been going well, by the way – but also my sideline gig as a ghostwriter. The ghostwriting is very challenging, but I do like it. The wife said recently she could see I was in my element, which I guess means I am a natural scholar. It certainly can’t mean I’m smart or anything, but it might imply that I gravitate to the work of reading, researching, adding my own stuff. I certainly would do it all day if I could.

What I am ghostwriting is a book on science and religion. The idea is to survey the current state of the religion and science debates, critique the science of religion and carve out a legitimate space for modern religious belief. I’m researching a whole bunch on the science and religion sides, and I’m charged with throwing in as much as I can of my employer’s existing writings on the subject.

I face a few critical challenges because (1) I don’t always find my employer to be rigorous in his argumentation and (2) I am, as I have only recently accepted, an incorrigible agnostic. My employer resembles most of the pro-religion crowd in using a fairly small battery of arguments and lines of evidence. Part of what I want to do is push the boundaries of these arguments and create something really fresh, interesting, provocative and maybe even true. The science-side arguments are really wonderful, and if I am successful, then it will actually be because of them.

Last night, I believe I came to a bit of a breakthrough, and I am very excited about it. Up until now, I have been exploring. I’ve been looking to make that argument which is truly unique and challenging, something that will make the science side pause and have to deal with it. Last night I think I finally touched on the claim and the argument that need to be made. Essentially, I am arguing that the scientific dichotomy between natural and supernatural is false. This in itself is not so radical. I have seen other articles in this vein, but they are short and not well supported. I think I can make a sustained case, and I think I can frame the supernatural as a testable hypothesis. This last bit may be too ambitious. Perhaps the best I can hope for is to propose a new dichotomy: natural and supernatural versus neither-natural-nor-supernatural.

I arrived at this line of thinking when I was trying to introduce the argument from design. I was critiquing the design argument as formulated by atheist mathematician John Allen Paulos, who is really sharp and a great writing mind. I didn’t like the way he presented the major premise of the argument from design: “Something – the diversity of life-forms, the beauty of the outdoors, the stars, the fine structure constants – is much too complex (or too perfect) to have come about randomly or by sheer accident.” My opinion was that complexity wasn’t the main criterion by which the possibility of supernatural guidance could be reasonably deduced. My logical problem then became explaining how to infer a qualitative difference between natural and supernatural. My conclusion was that either one could not make the distinction at all or that the difference was one of productivity: the supernatural creates something new while the natural does not. Basically, I’m trying to re-define something that’s been in front of us the whole time as something more than what we thought.

There’s more to say on this, and I don’t know that I will legitimately be able to make the argument stick. I would love to get some feedback from people outside my employer – people who will really challenge me to sharpen the reasoning or chuck it altogether. Yet I do know that if I can make this claim well and connect it throughout the chapters of the book, then the book itself stands a good chance of being very noteworthy, marketable and influential. Real scientists would be called upon to critique the argument. Religious people would be called in to voice their support.

So far, the book does a good job of undermining the rhetorical pretensions of the scientific and materialist models. At the beginning of the book, I thought I was trying to get science and religion to walk away from each other. Now I’m trying to put them on the same team.

Strange how life can work.

Portrait of the Writer as an Agnostic Prostitute

I'm excited to be a writer again. I say "again" because, even though I'm writing proposals all the time, it's rarely the kind of real insight-based writing that charges me up. So, that's what I'm doing, as a ghostwriter. And now that the first draft of the first half of the first chapter has been submitted for review, I'm feeling pretty good.

My task is actually quite daunting: I'm writing a book that gives the religious side of the science versus religion debate. This is, of course, a hot topic. The book's a critique of evolution and a defense of biblical claims for creation. Now, as I have shared, I am more fully engaged with Judaism than ever before in my life, on both and intellectual and personal devotional level. Yet I remain quite agnostic in many areas, the origin and development of life in the universe being two examples. This actually helps in the writing dynamic, in my opinion. I am not fully sympathetic to the author's positions, so I am working to make their best case. Part of the problem is the awful logic often employed by creationists and design proponents. It usually involves incredulity and reliance on very old objections against the materialist method.

I've always said it's possible to do anything as a writer, to make anything cohesive - here's my chance to put up or shut up. So far, I think I've made an excellent case. I attack science for behaving in violation to its stated principles. I point out some selective criticism their arguments employ, I emphasize the reasonableness and sophistication of religious rationalism, I stress the difference of course that the book will take (how it knows the usual rhetorical ploys anti-evolutionists us and tries either to improve them or avoid them), and I claim the weakness of evolutionary theory. This last point, if I can make it convincingly, will be a towering achievement, because quite honestly I have not really seen a credible case against evolution. But I am going to rip out its heart by slashing into its textual edifice. When I'm done, it's "our discourse is truth" myth will be, if not shattered, then on equal footing with that of religious discourse. My target is its determination of facts: take out that which makes facts factual and the whole wall comes down. As I said, though, it's going to be tough to make this case really work and be convincing.

The author I work for has so far been difficult. He's always busy and hard to reach, and I don't think he does a great job of either reading/acknowledging the things I say (such as, yes, I HAVE started writing) or striving to understand the more abstract arguments I tend to make. I certainly do know that my tendency is to abstract thought and I always seek to ground things well, but I need the guy to push himself a bit too.

In the writing, I am finding a lot of passion and struggle in myself. It's good, I'm learning a lot and swaying between almost complete atheism and firm religious belief. It's interesting. There are just so many great perspectives available online. I am glad that I am able to be swayed. I am not an easy sway, but my openness is partly what makes it all work. Now, it could be that my author is not happy with what I have drafted. If that's the case, then we surely will not be able to work together. In just the first 4000 words, I have laid out some provocative themes. This book will be a sensation if the author doesn't try and neuter it. If he does, then I can still take solace in having learned something valuable about book writing.

Parenting My Inner Child

I want to revisit some ideas I put forth in a previous post. I had borrowed some parenting advice from the famous Rabbi Shmuley Boteach and turned it around by applying it to myself. Today, I will talk about these ideas in more detail.

Yes, co-opting parenting advice as self-help shows me to be a bit egocentric, which is part of the problem. Yet, I feel there is real wisdom in Rabbi Boteach's principles that I can use to improve my attitudes and behavior.

Stop Asking What I Want to Do with My Life—Start Asking Who I Want to Be
It's no problem to ask who I want to be, but I don't think I know the answer. Perhaps there isn't supposed to be one answer or one answer that holds true now and forever. I know I want to be a "good dad" and a "good husband." I also know I want to be "successful" and "accomplished."

Honestly, though, who I want to be is me. And who am I? Just some guy who loves his kids and wife, loves his life, and loves to learn more about his G-d and his G-d's people. On the one hand, I want to embrace my anonymity and commonality, but on the other hand, I want to cultivate my uniqueness. Is who I am tied to what I do? No, it's tied to who I love and what I love.

Stop Speaking About My Career—Talk Instead About My Calling
What is a "calling"? It is the work for which I was made. What work or kinds of work was I made to do? Hmm. I feel like I was made to explain things and write, but mainly I feel I was made to play and work with other people. I was made to build a community. Not build it myself, but to be part of the building and to be a leading force in it. There are many communities already established that I could be part of - I do not need to build an entirely new one. Certainly, the community I want to build is a Jewish community.

Now, I work as a proposal writer - how does this help me fulfill my calling to build communities and help people? It doesn't, at least directly. It's not the work as proposal writer that's important. Meeting new people and establishing positive working relationships with them is the meaningful part. When I think about what's happened to me at my former job, what I made happen, I see that I violated one of the sayings of the Pirkei Avot, from Rabbi Joshua: "An evil eye, the evil inclination, and the hatred of one's fellows, drive a person from the world." I was - and have been - envious of others, lazy and inattentive, and two-faced. Now I am driven from this "world."

Stop Focusing on Achievements and Accomplishments and Start Focusing on Intellectual Curiosity
I know that I am very much focused on achievements and accomplishments - or rather, my lack of them. But the advice is to focus on intellectual curiosity.

This last term is quite interesting because curiosity is by definition already intellectual. It refers to the desire to learn and know things. Intellectual curiosity means just this kind of wanting to learn new concepts and arguments, and it also suggests a wanting to understand the makeup of one's own intellect.

In real world terms, the advice for me is not to pursue and MBA but rather to study the direction of my passions for business-related knowledge. What is it in business that I really want to investigate? The nice thing about curiosity is that it combines emotion and reason - passion drives thinking.

Stop Speaking About Happiness—Start Speaking Instead About Purpose
For some time now, I have been concerned with being happier, with the idea that I am not happy enough or as happy as I could be. I have bought several books on it, the best of them being Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar. Yet, in this principle I am asked to jettison the enitire concept for the idea of purpose.

Or maybe I am not supposed to abandon the idea so much as realize that it is a product of a process and not necessarily an active state. I could be way off here - I certainly feel as though I am not correctly or fully expressing the principle - but purpose is about meaning, lasting value, and representation of interests that are not solely my own. I realize I do not do many things that have or that embody purpose. If I truly want happiness, and it is not entirely certain that I do, it must be as a by-product of living my purpose.

Stop Emphasizing Friends—Start Emphasizing Family
This one really should be easy, seeing as I have few friends. Yes, I am trying to build and expand my professional and social network, but these are not friends.

On the other hand, I wonder if I can truly say I emphasize family. In many ways, I emphasize work and my personal projects over my own family. I am often impatient with my wife and children. I am frequently reluctant to visit or entertain my parents, brothers, in-laws and neighbors. It's sometimes a struggle for me to act and feel genuine in front of even the people to whom I feel closest.

The reason for these feelings lies right out in the open: I am ashamed of myself because I have not accomplished anything of the greatness that I always thought was inside me. This is the source of all for me, and until I deal with this either by acceptance or by accomplishing something that seems worthy then I will always have this cancer in my mind.

Stop Speaking About Attention Span and Focus—Start Focusing on Love
I am very critical of myself, and I see I have passed this on to my children. I feel bad that I am spread out among too many tasks and aspirations and obligations, so much so that I sometimes have to sneak in other work while I am at my primary job. This kind of multi-tasking is clearly not good for me or my career.

The advice being given here is is one of adjusting priorities. Instead of telling myself that I need to be more focused and disciplined, I need to assert my need to love what I am doing, to do it passionately and with a spirit that only I can bring. In the end, we are talking about the same thing, about sustaining work in a concentrated area, but the difference is one of uniting my head, my heart and my activity into one energy. When I focus only on my lack of attention and focus, only part of the problem - and not the real problem - is being addressed.

This guidance, too, works in the realm of how I deal with my wife and children. Yes, I need to pay better attention and be a better listener. Changing the behavior, however, will be much better and more effective if I use my love as a husband and father to drive the activity. I'm not just trying to ge practiced at real listening, I'm trying toremember that if I love someone I want to show it through genuine engagement.

Status Report - Grateful

At the beginning of the year, I made a high-level plan on how I wanted to live. The basic idea was that I would use Maslow's hierarchy to target specific behaviors that would improve my sense of well-being and purpose. I liked the plan when I devised it for myself; I like it now.

So, how am I doing with the plan? In some - maybe many - respects, not great. I'm really not eating clean or exercising regularly. I did set up a savings account. I help with the house, but I need to do more. Same with quality time with the family. I do call my family often. I haven't done much with the house, but I did get the lawnmower repaired and got the birds out of the air conditioning. I have done jack squat with keeping my areas clean. I certainly don't read Torah often enough, and I am not exercising my creativity as I'd hoped. And, well, I do reflect on myself too often.

So, OK, maybe I'm operating at a C grade. I can improve, I'm sure. Of course, anyone can decide to change his habits or his life or his mind. The key part is doing the work once the decision has been made. This is where I have fallen down, and this is where I need to take a hard look in the mirror and ask whether I really want to change. Maybe I don't. That's OK too, isn't it?

In an unrelated development, I had a rather interesting situation. I was at Becky's church, and the pastor of the day was giving his sermon. He brought Martin Luther into the picture, and of course I nearly gagged because to me Luther is a no-good anti-semite and I don't really care to hear anything about him or by him. But of course, these folks can easily forgive Luther and separate his anti-semitism from the rest of his theology because they weren't tormented by Luther's minions.

I later sent Becky some lowlights from Luther's anti-semitic writings, and she forwared these to the pastor, also noting her displeasure. The pastor - and I'm sure he's a nice guy who means well - sent back the kind of vanilla response I suppose I'd expected: "I'm so sorry, I meant no harm, Luther was certainly in the wrong on many things, he was a man and therefore imperfect, and" - I knew it was coming - "only Yeshu was perfect."

These people and their Yeshu! On the one hand, I have to admire what seems like genuinely internalized belief - apparently true faith. On the other hand, these folks need to wake up and smell the coffee. It's extraordinary how they pray to a man, fixate on sin and death as a way to excuse bad behavior, and use pretty songs to generate heart-dominated worship (as opposed to head and heart worship). The people sway to the music and raise their hands, but it is all rally just vapid. And their "new testament" - don't get me started. What it says is hardly original or significant, yet what it does to Tanach is criminal.

I suspect these people all intuitively realize Yeshu is a mythical character, but they also actually believe the myth. In fact, this is what gives them their strength. In a scary world, they depend on the myth to personify their heart's desires and stabilize their ambiguous identites and need for a sense of purpose. Poor folks, they cannot bear to reflect on HaShem alone, so the Yeshu myth helps them feel oriented, grounded and - perhaps most important of all - involved. Though I am decidedly not apologizing for them or anyone, their idol-worship is a monumental achievement of rationalization against evidence.

I can only thank and praise HaShem that I was not made a gentile.

Coming Back, Bringing In, Letting Go

I have a post from February 8 that I never uploaded:

I haven’t written a post in some time. Although I am quite busy, and it is past 11:00 p.m. as I compose these words, I’m quite happy tonight to be writing. I have Friday off from work, but I will be busy enough tomorrow (which is almost today). For the past two hours I have been typing away on loose ends for Bob and then a work/thought structuring document for Dennis and Dori. I think these products turned out all right.

I am so monumentally busy these days. It’s nothing new. I’ve been complaining quite a bit about my boss. He treats me like I’m his secretary. I don’t doubt that this is actually what he believes I am. To him, I’m marketing support, not marketing. To me, support means hired help, and it means I’m apart from any bonus consideration or other financial incentives.

This is why I have been working to get out of my current position, if not my company. I have recently begun to think that what I really want is to work for the government, probably the federal government. I liked the possibility of working at that other place, King David’s Coffee. It’s just too good. Maybe when Becky has C.J. and then comes home. If I can get some free time, I’ll go and see what happens.

Now, C.J. is due to arrive soon, G-d willing. I’m very excited to see my boy and welcome him home. Hopefully, HaShem will make this so, and look kindly upon my son. Naming him after my grandfather makes me happy. For a long time, I knew that if G-d ever granted me a son, the child would be Charlie. It’s a beautiful thing to have one’s children named after the beloved dead. Yes, the dead remain missed and mourned, but with the children, it is like having a part of them here. Or maybe it’s better to say it’s a bit like having them here. Either way, it’s one of the joys that come into the household with the children.

My Emily continues to be an apple of my eye. Hannah, too, of course, but Emily’s at that age I so loved when Hannah was there. Emily’s still young enough to need me, you see. At almost five, Hannah knows everything and bosses me around. But Emily just wants to be happy and make her noises. I think she’s quite independent, and she has, perhaps, a cagey intelligence. Hannah’s intellect is more active. She’s always pushing it, testing it, using it. If she gets her mind set to some area of knowledge, I think she’ll become a master of it. May HaShem, blessed be He, make it favorably so!

Yes, I am busy and lucky. I’ve been given a lot and I have much to repay.

Quite a bit has happened since this post. I am moving on to a different and, I think, better job opportunity. Yes, it is a lateral move and not a big salary bump - only $500 annually - but the work seems interesting and exciting, and the company is located much closer to home. The benefits are better, too.

C.J. has arrived and he is - seriously - a good looking boy. I can already tell that he's funny. I've seen him laugh a few times, and it's the cutest thing. The girls are really great. Hannah just loves being the big sister, and Emily loves to touch C.J.'s head.

I have gained SO much weight! I tipped the scales today at 192. Yes, that is correct: one-hundred and ninety-two pounds. Not good. I've gone on runs every now and again, but my diet is out of control.

Passover is coming this weekend. I'm trying to think through the idea of "personal liberation." The idea fits with the season, as in "let my people go." The other part of the equation, however, is letting go so that I can serve HaShem. I am rather selfish, very selfish, and do have trouble with this last part. Every year, I want to be free. Every year, I feel as though I am not free. Not to complain, but frankly it's exhausting to feel so dissatisfied all the time. I really want to get away from this. A blog entry from Rabbi Shmuley Boteach sums up the values I wish to stress to and within myself (edited by me, with apologies to Rabbi Boteach):

1. Stop asking what I want to do with my life—start asking who I want to be.
2. Stop speaking about my career—talk instead about my calling.
3. Stop focusing on achievements and accomplishments and start focusing on intellectual curiosity.
4. Stop speaking about happiness—start speaking instead about purpose.
5. Stop emphasizing friends—start emphasizing family.
6. Stop speaking about attention span and focus—start focusing on love.

Bottom line? I'm not worrying.

The Gift of 'Tude

So, here I am on the eve of my (gulp) thirty-eighth birthday. I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, it’s just another birthday and not a big deal. On the other hand, time continues to pass and I have so much I want to do. I’m afraid that when I finally decide those things I really want or want to do, I’ll be too old and/or inform to make them happen.

But I come back to the kids, and I can’t help but be pleased and grateful. Hannah and Emily are just so wonderful, and though I know I have many improvements to make as a parent, I feel confident that they will grow up just fine.

I’ve been thinking these last few days that morality, real day-to-day morality, comes down only to a few simple principles, chief of which are gratitude and truthfulness. Being thankful, I realized, is essential. Good people appreciate what they have and what is given to them. Gratitude also seems tied to happiness. Refraining from telling lies also seems important, not least because it never burdens one. People who tell even small untruths often seem heavy with the responsibility of carrying these statements around with them. Lies don’t go away.

In the Pirkei Avot, Yehoshuah ben Perachya is attributed to the following statement: “Make for yourself a teacher; acquire for yourself a friend; and judge every person favorably.” At the risk of being off-base, being grateful makes everyone one’s teacher, and truthfulness acquires friends for one. The third point, which I had not really factored in my scheme, considers that one should be proactively charitable in one’s view of all others. It’s kind of two parts behavior and one part attitude.

Maybe my gift to myself this year is the gift of judging every person favorably. It should be.

This Ship Remains Straight-ish

Re-capping the general directives I've issued for myself this year, I am attempting to cover the following:

1. Eat clean; Exercise regularly (Physiological)
2. Build a savings account through regular, automatic withdrawals (Safety)
3. Help clean and maintain the house; Schedule quality time; Call my family and brothers every week (Belonging-Love)
4. Improve the house; Keep “my” areas clean and organized (Self-esteem)
5. Read Torah every day; Be creative; Reflect on myself less (Self-actualization)

Thinking about the week that just passed, I have to say not bad: I've hit a little something in all categories. It seems to me that the Belonging-Love and Self-esteem needs are the ones that resonate most with me. This is somewhat surprising because self actualization needs are, right now, not that important to me. Perhaps if I can shore up the lower two levels, then these needs will gain in importance for me.

I have a busy week coming up, so I need to keep my head on straight and stay positive. I have not done a good job at all with physical exercise. This week, I want to drop to about 180 pounds. It's a stretch, but I think I can do it with proper diet and exercise. In addition, I am looking to plan my call for submittals soon. More on this later ….

You Say You Want a Resolution

Welcome to 2008. Yes, I have some concepts for how I want to behave this year:

1. Eat clean; Exercise regularly (Physiological)
2. Build a savings account through regular, automatic withdrawals (Safety)
3. Help clean and maintain the house; Schedule quality time; Call my family and brothers every week (Belonging-Love)
4. Improve the house; Keep “my” areas clean and organized (Self-esteem)
5. Read Torah every day; Be creative; Reflect on myself less (Self-actualization)

I would call the concepts above “directives” rather than “resolutions” because they are open-ended and ongoing. It’s more like I’m trying to steer the ship than reach a destination.

I used Abraham Maslow’s famous hierarchy of needs to provide a structure for these directives, which are surprisingly home-based. I certainly have lofty goals and ideals I wish to reach – collect submittals for a book-length project, revise and get “Hannah’s Moon” published, draft an original APMP article, etc. – but perhaps I have realized that any so-called success I am to have will come from cultivating my self at home.

Maybe, as I approach 38 years old, I am getting beyond reducing myself to spiritual, material, or professional definitions. Maybe. Let’s go read some Torah.

Yikes and Yuks

Just had a glance over my last few posts. Apparently, I only write when I'm depressed and whiny.

I feel just this way now, as a matter of fact, but I have to laugh (yes, at this line, I am thinking of that Beatles song). My mind really is blown out. Middlesex classes just finished. The weekday class was a failure. The Saturday style didn't translate well at all. Good news is that I feel I know how to fix it.

What's more, I'm totally floundering at work. I can't tell if I'm on the way out or just irrelevant to the proceedings of the business.

Hiring TMI was a good move, but I fear that I'll move someplace else and simply repeat the same pattern that's plagued me up until now. What I want, what I really want, is to run a small business - just me and some other guy, and no limit as limit.

I've slipped back into almost total non-Judaism, which pains me because I have learned so much this past year. One thing I have learned is that when in doubt, read Torah. That's what I am going to do now.

Shalom.

Out of the Whirlwind

I've been meaning to check in for some time now, but I've been so incredibly busy that I am having a hard time keeping up with everything.

Let's catch up on news, first. I am having a third child -- the wife is, actually -- and it's a boy. I'm ecstatic about this, naturally. Emily is getting big. She's at a great age and I'm totally bonkers for her. Hannah is in pre-school, but she is still de facto boss of the house. She's a great kid, and funny as anything.

Work is going OK. I'm still with the same company, but not sure how to move my career ahead. I am going to start dressing more professionally, and see if I can bring an upgraded attitude with me. We're very busy, and our executive team has been all shaken up. If I can keep my job, I think it will be good for my career and my wallet.

APMP Nor'easters has its first-ever symposium this coming week. As president, I have several responsibilities and concerns.

Teaching two classes is difficult. I can't remember names and I have not been preparing as well as I think I need to.

Anything else? My goodness, that's a lot of stuff.

Well, there's plenty of else, but where to start?

Yom Kippur just concluded some hours ago, and I am greatly disappointed in myself. I never let myself be all there this year. I allowed myself to be distracted, I permitted indulging in thoughts of business and other monkeyshines, and I never felt all that guilty about it. So, I see that I have behaved like a jerk but I'm not prepared to do anything about it. Apparently I have become almost comfortable with being a sociopath.

Happy New Year.

Preserving the Trees of Elul

Today’s Shabbat services at Chabad focused on a certain passage from the Parshah (Devarim 20:19-20):

When you besiege a city for many days to wage war against it to seize it, do not destroy its trees by swinging an axe against them, for from it you will eat, and you shall not cut it down; is the tree of the field a man that it should enter the siege before you? Only a tree that you know is not a food tree, it you may destroy and cut down, and build a bulwark against the city that makes war with you, until it is conquered.

Our discussion question, basically, was how is a tree like a man. I realize I am not providing some useful context here about how the question was presented, but the important part is that this was the question we were supposed to ponder individually.

The actual discussion brought up things such as “man, like a tree, creates ‘fruit,’” which is so in issuing children or disciples, performing mitzvot, studying Torah, performing acts of teshuvah, praying to HaShem, and so on. Discussion also focused on the way man develops his Jewish roots in childhood, grows them strong and wide later in life, and yields fruit – see above – through work, study and service. These were nice, meaningful discussions.

I was struck with the context of the passage. What interested me was that the passage concerned the conduct of war. I thought it was important that in a time of war there would be this constraint not to destroy a fruit-bearing tree.

It made me think that we are commanded to keep our aggression in check, to remember that war, though violent by definition, should not descend into all-out brutality, cruelty and destruction. Yes, there is a practical reason not to destroy a fruit-bearing tree: we may feed off of it. And yes, there is a logical reason to preserve such a tree: after all, it won’t suddenly become a warrior fighting against you like a man.

I also thought there were two key spiritual imperatives involved in protecting the fruit-bearing tree. One was the imperative to maintain one’s judgment, particularly one’s ability to distinguish things with real value. The other was the imperative to preserve one’s own stores of energy: if you swing an axe against every tree, you may tire yourself out for an actual opponent!

To me these two imperatives have a special purpose in the month of Elul. As we reflect on the year that’s closing, and on our character development and interactions with fellows, we wage a kind of war against ourselves in which virtually everything about us appears wrong. Why did I act so impulsively, so selfishly? How could I be so insensitive to so-and-so? Why couldn’t I have been more disciplined, more diligent, or more responsible? In this war, we could really become very aggressive against ourselves.

However, even in this war, we can remember to withhold some of our wrath, for we have some fruit-bearing trees that can be preserved. When we reflect on the same year, we can remember our acts of service, kindnesses and lessons learned. And we can let these be as they are, without seeking out their minute imperfections. Criticizing and fretting over every detail of every behavior eventually becomes a waste of energy and a confusion of the true direction one’s teshuvah should take – which is toward HaShem, rather than toward oneself.

So I did not exactly think about how man is like a tree, or a tree like a man. Rather, I thought about how men have, and how they plant, many kinds of tree in a year. It occurred to me that Elul is not about wiping out the past entirely, but creating an environment for its best trees to grow and to develop its yield of fruit.

The principle applies as well to approaching others. For example, maybe one has a dislike of a co-worker. One could realize that even this co-worker has a fruit-bearing tree – a skill, a common interest, a word or deed – that can be found and appreciated. Who knows? By seeing this tree and letting it stand, perhaps a wonderful friendship could result.